On abandoning facebook

I am no longer on Facebook, this is not recent or new, I took the leap 2 years ago.

I had grown increasingly dissatisfied with the social network, and by the time I was wasting scrolling newsfeed.
No regret about the decision, the only feature I had to find an alternative is the ability to keep in touch with some people, especially since I move abroad and to a different city, in other word going back the old fashioned way: use email, shockingly call directly using my phone.

I want to discuss here the strategy I have been using.

First, not all acquaintance are equal, we get closer to some and disconnect ed to others, and those relations keep evolving over time.

Leaving Facebook forces you to sort out this, and prioritize the relationship you value and want to preserve, and the one you can do without, and can easily prune out.

Now I have few categories, two sometimes overlapping

1. Work and colleagues relationship
All work-related connection has been moved and is staying exclusively on Linkedin. The platform is great to stay in touch with colleague, industry progress and jobs opportunities, without too much of the un-wanted noise. I  have found noisier and noisier content appearing in the last two years, but careful use of the unfollow feature is helping to keep it under control.

2. Family and friends
Email, messaging, Skype, phone, or even better meeting directly face to face.
I am not short of families gathering on the Irish side, for the people abroad it does require more voluntary effort - and I need to improve on that.
I have setup shared photo albums, so they can be easily accessed by my family abroad.
In the end, I found that I do need to schedule a time for the phone call or meetup, allowing a dedicated time for exchange is what works for me best.

3. Acquaintances, toxic relationship, old flames...

Simply put, it is cut off from all social network. I may still have their contact details somewhere.
If I happen to cross the path of old acquaintances, I happily say hi, and exchange a few moments... they usually turn out to be happy fortuitous events.
For the rest, I am much happier without those crossing my mind either physically or virtually.

I would encourage anybody to read Cal Newport articles on this subject.

Update: 

• Tim Harford post on the subject :
  http://timharford.com/2019/02/how-behavioural-economics-helped-me-kick-my-smartphone-addiction/

Update: June 2019

• Following this, I also deleted my Twitter, Instagram accounts

Update: October 2019

• Not missing FB or twitter, but I decided to reactivate an Instagram account for a photo a day project. To ensure I don't waste too much time on the app, I have setup a 10 minutes limit per day (using Android Digital WellBeing setting), so that is 10 minute a day to do the picture and upload.

Update: January 2020
An interesting video from Melanie Murphy

Update: June 2020

My Instagram usage, increased again, so I have deleted the account for good this time.

Update: August 2021

• Re-activated a new twitter account so I could follow my kid school twitter account and the cycle bus information. No followers and limiting following to below 90 people. Not installed on my phone, only on my personal computer, Screen Time limited to 5 minutes everyday.
• Activated new instagram account, only on phone, with screen time limit of 10 minutes... very unsure about that, but it allows me to follow the wife...
• What's App usage has increased but it is replacing email, SMS, Skype and phone call, so no complain.
• Installed Signal on phone.

Maturity

On devient adulte lorsqu'on a accepté ces 5 i
Irreversibilité du passé
Imprévisibilité du futur
Imperfection du présent
Irrémédiabilité de la mort
Insensé du tout.

Carlo Moïso

Which you can translate by:
"You're becoming an adult when you accept thes 5 I:past is Irreversible future is Imprevisible present is Imperfet death is irremediable everything is Irrational ( the word insensé has actually a more powerful meaning)."

I was listening to the brilliant BBC program: Thinking Allowed (available in podcast), and they were talking about Male immaturity. Basically men today are no longer the manly men of the past, gone are the manly figures of John Wayne and Gary Grant from the movies, replaced by some eternal teenagers. TV, and movies seems to be all about teenage year not anymore about growned up. Men seeking eternal youthness, and playing video-games. An interesting thought by the guest, was that games enable men to play with power until the day the have real power... which does not seem to be the case.

The guest of the show was Gary Cross author of "Men to Boys: The Making of Modern Immaturity".

Reflecting on this, may be I should stop recreating Pirates battle with my playmobil:

Or try to make Godzilla vs Goldorak with my lego sets:


Thanks to "Ma Vie sans Moi" a French blog for the opening quotation.

Childhood Dreams ?

A moving lecture:


So what have you done with your childhood dreams ?

Is this post too long to read....

Contradicting the title, it will be a short post. I've just read two interesting articles about reading online: the first one form the New York Times about the generation gap existing in the way people read, and a more disturbing one called "Is Google Making Us Stupid ?" by N.Carr.

I have not realized it before, but online reading, fundamentally change the way you read, instead of immersing yourself in a lengthy article or a book, you mainly skim the surface of online article, jumping from one information to another. The online way is a fast, accumulation of data, and we don't really spend time to digest, re-think internally what we read, unlike the way you progress through a book.
And it seems that favoring the online reading, limits our concentration capabilities, because it's so easy to get distracted and jump to another subject.

finally a post....

Long time since I've been blogging regularly, just to keep up to date.

Activities:
- Sailing ( at least trying to learn ), fantastic week-end with the University of Limerick Activity Center. I have just done the course start sailing Level 1, and looking forward for the level 2.
- Nintendo DS: Brain Training and Brain Academy.. and so far the results BT = 26 year's old brain and BA = 1300g brain weight....
Unit of alcohols: 1 last week.
Books read: "Ubik" and "A Time out of joint" by Ph.K.Dick

Links:
- Le petit champignacien [FR], if you like the champignac mayor.
- BBC1 Zane Lowe Radio Show
- The nintendo Wii will be soon in our saloons...You can watch videos of people trying the system... my favourite is this french girl. Probably the most exciting console ( for the concept ) to come.

A mystery [FR]
Dans Truismes de Marie Darrieusseq, page 52 de l'édition P.O.L :
Un jour la dame en noir, l'amie de ma vieille cliente, m'a donné un euro. Elle croyait que j'avais faim.
Rien ne vous choque?
Le roman est paru en 1996, soit trois bonnes années avant le passage à l'euro (le premier janvier 1999). Même dans les bourses internationales, cette monnaie n'était pas utilisée avant 1998 ou 1999.
Étrangement, mieux que les autres disparités délibérement uchrononiques du récit, c'est ce détail-là qui le place pour moi dans une sorte d'anticipation bizarrement proche.
Ce n'est pas moi qui est remarque mais je l'ai decouvert ici.